Terrifying…
In the last few months I’ve had a couple of people comment that they no longer watch the news. It’s just too depressing. They don’t want the negativity. I get it. Really, I do. But that’s how things like what’s happening to the south of us gain strength. We ignore. We turn away. We hide our heads in the sand. This week I saw some videos online reflecting on the cancelling of one late night show and the suspension of the host of another. This is truly terrifying. When we allow free speech to be eliminated what have we become?
A man spoke out and shared his political opinions. Now let me be clear I truly did not agree with what he had to say. In fact, I believe his comments helped divide people and supported marginalizing groups. At no point would I ever say that he deserved to be shot because of what he said. I do not believe in killing people because of their beliefs. Years ago in high school I read an article in Time magazine. There was a picture of a black police officer doing his job along a KKK parade route. I didn’t understand how he could support that kind of hatred. He was interviewed in the article and said that he believed in free speech. So, he went to work and did his job that day. I still think of that article and that man and how much better a person he was than the people he was protecting that day. Back to the recent shooting in the U.S. I’m struggling with the idea of politicizing a murder. That’s been happening on both sides of the political line. It feels like free speech is gone and leads me back to my question. When we allow free speech to be eliminated what have we become.
It’s probably a chicken and egg problem. Does removing the ability to speak up, to challenge, to argue drive us to less compassion and diversity? Or is it the other way around. Does taking away rights for whoever we don’t agree with send us into free speech hell? Maybe it doesn’t matter. I kind of feel it does, though. All too often I feel we focus on outcomes and forget to look at causes.
In 1930’s Germany there was a calculated program designed to change the public perception of certain groups, especially the Jewish community. It was a marketing program - posters and newspapers depicted a whole community of people as rats and vermin. Why? Beyond the racism, the leaders knew what they were doing. They created an enemy to blame for all the woes of the day. We’re there again today. Or maybe it’s still. We’re still there. So anxious to blame someone else for what we don’t have or what someone else does have. As soon as we start feeling sorry for ourselves we open up the option to put someone down.
That’s one really terrifying issue I see in the world today. Number two on my hit parade? Climate change. When I look around Canada and consider the number of wildfires each summer and how early they start and how long they last I get truly scared. My son lives in the Vancouver area and has referred to the air quality issues from smoke so many times that I’ve lost count. I remember about ten years ago there was a bad summer. You could smell the smoke in your car as you drove through certain areas but then it cleared up and it slid from your thoughts as life continued. Nowadays it’s becoming a constant.
My son wonders if there will be a world in 30 or 40 years or will we humans have killed it? It certainly seems like we’re on killing sprees these days. Have we truly lost respect for all life? The life of people? The life of our planet? The life on our planet? Those are absolutely terrifying thoughts to me. When they creep into my conscious I want to run away and hide and yet, I started this blog by saying we can’t do that.
Okay, those are two global issues and I’ll agree that sometimes they slip from my daily thoughts as I’m busy grappling with my immediate world. That smaller world can be terrifying in its own way. I’m a month and a half from retirement. I’ve been trying to deal with it to the best of my ability. I’ve been considering it and planning for a couple of years. I’ve been counting down since I hit the one year mark but it’s getting real now and it’s kind of terrifying. I find myself wanting to apologize for speaking about it to friends or family. Most of them have some years left before they retire. It makes me feel guilty to talk about it. The truth is, the closer I get, the scarier it becomes. I’m not gloating. I’m looking for the love and support I’m used to, but now the topic might be harder for them. It’s not their reality yet and what they see is freedom.
They don’t see the sleepless nights and the panic when I think about the change. That’s okay. How can they? If I look at only the three things I’ve spoken about in this blog - global unrest and authoritarianism, climate impacts and what’s happening to our physical world and then the fear of losing my regular routine and paycheque, I can say they aren’t on the same scale. Those smaller things, the ones that impact us closely are as important as the big ones. Why? Because if we can’t keep moving forward in our daily lives how are we ever going to contribute to the world? And we really need to be giving back to our world - thinking about our impact to the environment; thinking about how a little bit of kindness might help another person.
Last night I went to a concert with a friend. One of the first things the main performer said was he was there to take us away from our everyday worries for two hours. (In fact it was more than two!) That’s when it hit me. We need those moments in our lives where we just relax. Where we soak up some fun. Where we surround ourselves with friends. Where we find a quiet corner and get lost in a book. Where we go out to a concert and let the music carry us away. Where we sit in a stadium and cheer on our team. Where we sit with our family and enjoy a meal together. We need all of those times. We need the peace they give to us and the healing that will in turn help us to stand up for our world.
Last night I laughed. I sang along. I danced. I spent time with a precious friend. The music sunk into my system and invigorated and calmed at the same time.
My world has been filled with terrors lately but taking the time to embrace the good reminds me that it hasn’t come to an end. It’s changing and I need to embrace the change. This is my choice. I’m not being forced to make this change. I made the decision. It is my decision how to contribute to this world in which I live - how do I make a positive and lasting change?
Maybe terrifying thoughts are what push me forward and force me into a different mindset. Since I don’t choose to hide my head in the sand, maybe they’re a reminder that it’s time to make a difference.
I have been looking for the “perfect” clock for my dining room for a couple of years. I found it!
I love going to craft markets with my mom. At a recent one there was a thrifting table and I got this excellent print for my sitting room/library!